Is it your fault?
by SonYukiGoku'sSister
Summary: Sanzo and Goku have a conversation on understand oneself better about the four elements. Kinda spiritual. Enjoy and please, please, please, read and review...


Is it your fault?

It was not raining but Hakkai had a cold. As the result the ikkou could not travel any further, they were only two rooms left in the inn, a single room and one with two beds. Goku was to sleep on the futon. Gojyo went out to bar for his nocturnal activities while Hakkai went into the single room to rest, and Sanzo and Goku stayed in the other room. Sanzo was reading a newspaper where Goku was munching thoughtfully on half a meat bun.

"Na... Sanzo?" Goku called.

"What?"

"That last temple...?"

"What about it?"

"Eto..." the boy hesitated, "I overheard a lesson in one of the rooms..."

"Hn?" the monk replied, looking from the newspaper.

"The teacher was talking about the four elements..." he explained, "you know..." he went on when the monk nodded, "how they composite every from a crawling ant to the blue whale. I can't understand how... and then in the town before that... they talk about how humans go back to earth which they, like every thing that's alive, are made from..."

Sanzo was about to wave his charge off by calling him 'stupid monkey' but when he saw the determination in the boy's eyes, he changed his mind. This happened to be the same question he had asked his master once. Goku had that same determined look that he had back then – he ought to know as there was a mirror in the same room he had caught a glimpse of himself before Koumyo Sanzo gave him the answer.

"The four elements," he began, "as you know, earth, air, fire and water makes up a part of us that is seen everywhere. Many people have different belief on what we are made of, that's why some people cremate the dead so the body will join the soul, or not be kept under ground. That's also why people are buried as well." The look in Goku's eyes were not very convincing, so he had to ask, "Does that answer your question?"

It took sometime before Goku answered his master as he tried to think about the information he had just received. "But I was born out of a rock wasn't I?" he asked then.

"Yeah," the blond replied indifferently, "So?"

"Is that why people refer to me as a heretic?" Goku asked then, "A monster? Because I'm some kind alien not born from the earth?"

Sanzo sighed exasperatedly. The conversation of him and his master echoing back to his mind. _"Is that why they called me 'the river rat'?" he asked, back then, "because I was unwanted? Possibly even born near the river? Or that my eyes aren't..." he hesitated for a moment, "aren't human?"_

_"Kouryu," Koumyo Sanzo said patiently, "Is it your fault? Did you ask to be born with amethyst eyes?"_

_"Eh?" Kouryu asked, stunned. He thought about it then, "Ano...?"_

_"Did you ask to be in the river?" Koumyo asked again._

_"Of course not," the boy answered with determination, "I'd be stupid to ask such a thing."_

_Koumyo Sanzo smiled then, and ruffled the boy's blond hair lightly, "There's your answer. You were found near the river, but it does not truly define your personality, not even your eyes can do that, even if they are the windows to your soul."_

_All Kouryu could do was stare in confusion._

_"You will understand someday," Koumyo assured him._

Sanzo then remembered, and understood. Everyone, humans or youkai, is unique, they were all born with a soul. It was no less his fault to have amethyst eyes than it is Goku's to have golden eyes – the windows to their soul. The colour of their eyes does not define their soul even if their past did scar it a bit.

"Is it your fault?" he then asked the boy, "Did you ask to be born with golden eyes?"

Goku just looked at him blankly. "I don't know."

"Did you ask to be born with golden eyes?" Sanzo asked again.

"No," Goku answered, "Not that I know of."

"There's your answer," his master said flippantly, returning to his newspaper, "You're a heretic by birth, not by nature. Which is why you're a brat with a bottomless pit of a stomach you stupid chimp."

Goku stared at his guardian for a minute, just thinking about the answer.

"Thanks Sanzo," the boy murmured quietly, as went back to munching his half of meat bun. Sanzo just snorted and went on reading his newspaper. A few minutes later he looked up to find the boy asleep and curled up on his futon. On the table was a half meat bun on a single plate. "Mataku..." he muttered.

Sanzo walked over, bent down and covered his ward with the blanket. From there, he just looked at Goku. He thought about the conversation he had with the boy just now. Though his counterpart betrayed the boy's dangerous side, and his golden eyes revealed his heresy birth, the monk knew that this boy was pure at heart. He was too good to travel on a mission like this, but he was strong. There was no doubt about it. He was stronger in spirit than he was in body, that's why he was still alive. "You're no monster," he whispered then, ruffling the boy's hair "Not to me."

**Author's note:**We're all insecure now and then, that's why I like Goku a lot. He reminds me of me in a certain way. I'm pretty insecure myself. He's a lot stronger in spirit than he is physically. There's always a certain characteristics about ourselves that we hate that seems to be a monster within us. In the end we just need a little boost of confidence, there are some things you didn't ask to be born with either isn't there? ;-) In the end, it's what we choose to see. Think about it. Sorry if I insulted anyone here.


End file.
